girl talk

Writing Challenge, Day 6


Conversation between Bryan and Perry. Deadpan, sarcastic, serious. Thanks to the inspiring convo I had with Macky and Eric earlier during dinner.



* * *

"He's straight."

"Really?"

"Yup. Well, I don't know. Ninety-seven percent sure."

"Hm."

"If he is straight, lalandiin mo pa rin ba?"

"Ba't naman hindi?"

"Paano nga yun? 'Pag ang lalaki ba pumatol sa bakla, does that mean he's gay too?"

"Of course not."

"Talaga? Parang sa 'yo ko narinig yun dati."

"Excuse me? I don't use the word patol, okay?"

"Ooh. I hit a nerve."

"Well you kinda did. 'Patol'... ugh!"

"What's wrong with the term?"

"Duh! Think about it. Doesn't the term sound like the person had no choice but to stoop down to a lesser level? Parang 'sige na nga lang'?"

"Now that you put it that way... yeah."

"And while we're on this subject, you know what I also really hate? When these guys claim they weren't able to do anything to stop the pagpatol. Wala na daw nagawa? Punyeta! Nasarapan din sila kahit papaano, no!"

"Baka naman kasi lasing..."

"Then it's an issue of self-control nila isn't it?"

"I dunno. I'm a girl. Hello?"

"Ay oo nga pala."

"Pero admit it, there are gay men who do take advantage of situations like that. Eh puta ka kakasabi mo lang kanina lalandiin mo pa rin yung tao maski straight eh!"

"He's different. Nilalandi rin nya ko eh."

"So pa'no nga yun?"

"Ang alin?"

"If a guy sleeps with another guy does that make them gay?"

"No."

"Why?"

"They can be bi."

"No such thing."

"Well if there's no such thing, then we go the the basic statement that sex does not equal love. If the guy still identifies himself as straight even if he has sex with other men, eh wala tayong magagawa. Jusko, just go to an all-boys Catholic school. Maraming tripper dun."

"I'm confused."

"Babae ka kasi."

"Ay oo nga pala."

"That's okay. By the way, it happens to both sexes ha? So be careful na lang baka maging tomboy ka when you reach thirty."